RfM: Herbs and Claws (A BenevolentClan Challenge) by Smokeshade
by Cheetahstar
Summary: Everyone I ask would tell me that a Warrior is a cat that defends their Clan against danger. The best fighter, the silent hunter, the strongest leader or the respected deputy. But the wisdom to discover the true meaning of a Warrior tends to come in the most unexpected ways... Even from the advice of a snappy friend. \A BenevolentClan challenge/
1. It all was falling in the Abyss

**EchoClan**

**Leader:** Badgerstar.- large black tom with white stripes along his flank. Pale blue eyes.

**Deputy: **Frozenswipe.- sender light grey she-cat with fierce icy blue eyes.

**Medicine Cat**: Redstrike.- skinny ginger tom with pale yellow eyes.

Warriors

Eagleshadow.- speckled brown tom with long fur, really long and sharp claws. Amber eyes.

Jayclaw.- white she-cat with a grey underbelly and blue eyes.

Snowflare.- white and ginger tom with long whiskers and mint green eyes.

Firepath.- small, dark golden she-cat with icy blue eyes.

Smokeshade.- smoky grey she-cat with black spotted markings and blue eyes.

Duststream.- black and ginger patched tom with amber eyes.

Nightsong: pale ginger and brown she-cat with cold amber eyes.

Wolfblaze.- long haired, pale brown and white tom with warm brown eyes.

Addercrash: dark grey she-cat with warm yellow eyes.

Apprentices

Goldenpaw.- long haired, yellow she-cat with green eyes.

Greypaw.- dark grey she-cat with white flecks and deep blue eyes.

Steampaw.- calico tom with bright amber eyes.

Queens

Snowclaw.- dark grey she-cat with green eyes.

Elders

Trushcloud.- big brown tabby tom with yellow eyes.

Hailwhisker.- scarred white tom with deep green eyes.

* * *

_To avoid confusion:_

EchoClan has different traditions and terminology than the rest of the Clans. They actually belief that the success of a Clan and the only way to avoid it from being destroyed or broken apart is to keep the ancient traditions and Code.

**Terminology**

Sun: a day.

Co-supervisor: a second cat who watches the assessment of an apprentice along with the mentor. Their report is of greater importance than the mentor's.

Fighting stage: the several different battle techniques and styles that are taught to apprentices to be used on specific terrain. Example.- on the shore, in the caves, in a clearing.

Old fox: term used as insult for the ones who are deaf, blind or have any other disability.

Wanderer: a loner.

Shortflow: a river that has dried up partially.

Highflow: a once calm river that has changed to have a particularly strong current with a danger of flooding.

Emergency patrol: patrols organized to search for herbs or materials to reinforce the structure of the entrance during abnormal weather.

* * *

"Hey! That's not fair!"

Smokeshade rolled her eyes at the young apprentice's irritated yowls. Of course Greypaw would start complaining about having to fight her mentor -a normal thing for any EchoClan apprentice mind you- or any other cat with more experience than her for the matter. The she-cat's dramatic attitude was what made her infamous in the Clan after all.

A low growl hiding barely sustained anger snapped Smokeshade of her thoughts. The blue eyed she-cat returned her attention to the two sparring cats a few fox-lengths away with certain morbid amusement. The dark grey pelt of Greypaw was matted in wet mud, the substance slowly marching down her paws and back to the ground. In sharp contrast, the imposing form of Duststream observed his apprentice's reaction with almost no trace of mud clinging to his body. Smokeshade had to admit it: the tom was the best when teaching mischievous apprentices how to respect the Code.

"I can't fight like this! The mud makes my movements slow and forced! I can barely manage the speed to avoid your attacks", Greypaw hissed in evident frustration. To demonstrate her point she stomped the ground with her front legs until they were half stuck in the substance. "See?!"

Duststream growled and grabbed the apprentice by the scruff -much to Smokeshade's delight- and dropped her on a different part of the Great Shore. "Look, I know you hate getting your pelt viscous but until you join another Clan or turn into a fox you will follow my orders. Every single one of your clanmates already approved this fighting stage! Why can't you even try?" Either Greypaw flinched at the way the last words were spat at her or she simply tried to shake off the rest of the mud from her muzzle, Smokeshade would never know. What she did know was that from that moment, the dramatic apprentice cooperated with her mentor and finished the shore-fighting in record time.

Once Greypaw had marched off to met with her fellow apprentices did Smokeshade got up from her spot and addressed Duststream. "Charming she-cat you were given to train", the smoky warrior purred. Duststream growled in mock annoyance and shock off the mud on his hind legs. Knowing that the black and ginger tom wouldn't answer so easily, Smokeshade continued ranting. "Personally, I don't think she is ready to become a warrior. I mean, she whines about every single fighting stage that she must complete. What is she going to do if RaggedClan invades again? Complain until they are too annoyed to battle? Now that would be worth watching! A whole Clan retreating because the whines got too irritating"

"You just love to bother me, right Smokeshade?", Duststream said with a sigh. The she-cat nudged him with a paw, "But of course! If I didn't then you wouldn't be my friend!"

The tom glanced one last time at the shortflow river with a frown and motioned Smokeshade to follow him back to Camp. "If it was my decision then Greypaw wouldn't put a paw inside the warrior's den for many moons. She isn't even ready to live the life of a warrior. That she-cat will get herself killed during a border battle. But..."

"But what?", Smokeshade studied him in surprise. "You are not seriously going to tell Frozenswipe that she's ready, are you?" At being greeted by silence, Smokeshade growled in outrage. "You are going to tell her that! You are going to allow Badgerstar to make her a warrior soon! Forget it Duststream! I'm the one who was co-supervising her final assessment and my report will be full of reasons to stuck her as apprentice for several other moons"

Smokeshade expected Duststream to argue. She expected him to snap back at her with all the valid arguments to allow Greypaw to become a warrior. What she wasn't expecting was the sudden pressure of a tail blocking her jaws. The tom glared at her with cold amber eyes. "I'm not bursting with happiness either! I would follow your opinion and present a negative assessment of my apprentice when confronting the deputy because I know all of that is true. Even if we have the facts you need to understand! The Clan has too few warriors right now! RaggedClan has even more members than ever in our history! Frozenswipe called all of the mentors two suns ago to tell us to present a positive report of our apprentices' progress so Badgerstar can make them all warriors at once! I know Greypaw will be more of a liability in battle but I don't want to face Frozenswipe's wrath when she realizes that I neglected her orders"

Ah, so that was the reason! The smoky grey warrior had seen the tension practically leaking from the other mentors when they encountered their apprentices and the co-supervisors at the Camp's entrance. And she had not failed to see Frozenswipe's predatory gaze focusing on the mentors from the Moss Stone either. The deputy was just being too demanding and unfair; those poor apprentices were under the illusion that they were becoming warriors because of their advanced abilities, not because EchoClan needed some extra sets of claws in battle.

"Don't blame Frozenswipe for this, Smokeshade. All of us are living during difficult times, she is just doing what she thinks is right"

The smoky she-cat snarled at her friend like a wounded fox and her eyes became cold. "I know she thinks that's right but that's just no enough excuse! The difficulties of the path can't even justify this violations of the Code! What's next, forcing a senior she-cat warrior to become a queen in order to increase our numbers? Ripping away the medicine cat from his position and force him to train as warrior? Sending the elders out to battle? This is insane! I will give a positive assessment of Greypaw just because you're my friend but don't expect me to do that again for anyone!"

If Smokechase had looked back during her determined march to Camp she would have seen the hurt and remorse flashing in Duststream's amber eyes.

**Xxx**

"I, Badgerstar, leader of EchoClan, call upon our warrior ancestors to look down upon this apprentices. They have shown exceptional abilities during their training and assessments and I'm proud of the positive revisions of the mentors and co-supervisors", the powerful baritone voice of Badgerstar reached Smokeshade's ears. She was currently curled up in her nest, having refused to attend the ceremony, but she couldn't block the sounds from outside. Of course she had given the promised positive revision of Greypaw -StarClan rip that smile from Frozenswipe's face- and personally congratulated the apprentice as the tradition demanded but her own morals stopped her from joining her clanmates by the Moss Stone.

"Goldenpaw, Greypaw, Steampaw, will you give your life for the Clan and promise to follow our Code even when the starry pelts of our ancestors greet you when your time comes?"

"I do", three voices with barely contained enthusiasm replied at unison.

"The by the might of our ancestors I give you your warrior names. Goldenpaw, you shall now be known as Goldenwing! Greypaw, you shall now be known as Greyfrost! Steampaw, you shall now be known as Steamcloud! This young cats shall now be allowed to participate in battle, to visit the hunting grounds of our territory unsupervised and to move to the warrior's den. This apprentices are no more! Lets welcome the new warriors of EchoClan!"

"Goldenwing! Greyfrost! Steamcloud!", the Clan's cheering was irritatingly joyous. Yes, they were three now warriors to launch themselves at the RaggedClan rivals. Of course they symbolized new hope for the future of EchoClan. Yes, they appeared to be ready to defend the Clan but Smokeshade knew better than that. Did all of her clanmates really thought that those childish, arrogant and unexperienced cats could face the strong and battle-hardened warriors of RaggedClan? To those who season upon season would snatch a piece of EchoClan's territory?

"StarClan help my Clan", Smokeshade murmured as she drifted off in sleep.

**Xxx**

"I hate rain"

A simple statement. A true one at that. Those simple three words that were answered with groans or murmurs of approval. Smokeshade found herself nodding much to her annoyance. Who knew that a prolonged rain would cause her to actually agree with Greyp-Greyfrost for once?

"When is this horrible rain going to stop? We have been in here for suns!"

"Shut up Nightsong! Your yowls keep won't let me sleep!"

"I'm not yowling, you dog-breath! I'm simply demonstrating my thoughts about this terrible weather"

"Same thing", murmured someone by the back of the den.

Smokeshade rolled her eyes. Nightsong could be even worst than Greyfrost when it came to complaining. The egomaniac she-cat had been whining about the rain from the very start of it and she gave no sign of stopping.

"Perhaps now RaggedClan will be less likely to attack us", a tom by the name of Snowfang muttered when Nightsong stopped to catch her breath. Smokeshade cringed unconsciously at the reality behind the tom's words. True, RaggedClan was the enemy but not even them should suffer from such weather. The she-cat vaguely remembered a Camp in the middle of two enormous canyon walls from a long forgotten battle. She could still remember the caves at ground level full with moss nests from where screeching warriors emerged to defend their Camp. They would be full of water and wet bodies by now. Of course, if they had chosen a Camp like EchoClan had then they wouldn't need to worry about those problems. The dens were caves too, but they were completely protected from the harsh weather and also far from the ground. Even better, silent direct attacks during the night were impossible, as the entrances were covered by a tunnel of brambles that made it difficult to enter if you weren't an instructed EchoClan cat.

"I guess we shall wait", Snowfang sighed tiredly. The tom's fur was wet and his nest was damped as well by now. It appeared that he was on one of the emergency patrols that Badgerstar appointed. Well, they really would need those herbs by the end of the storm. StarClan knows how many cats would be infected with Greencought.

Smokeshade curled up tighter on her nest to block away the still complaining screechy voice of Nightsong and the annoyed growls of most of the den's occupants.

Xxx

Her name being called by the cold voice broke Smokeshade's peaceful resting. She unwillingly rolled to her paws and stretched quickly, ignoring the unpleasant sensation of the damped soil clinging to her pads. Her blue eyes glanced with a bored expression at Frozenswipe as she walked up to the Moss Rock. The deputy regarded her with an emotionless icy blue gaze. "You are to lead a patrol up to the Southern border. Check the river's flow, mark the border and scout for any sign of trespassing. Eagleshadow, Greyfrost and Addercrash are to accompany you"

The mentioned cats looked up from their conversations and walked to the Moss Rock. Smokeshade looked at her patrol and nodded, flicking her tail as a sign to follow her. As they slipped inside the Rock Tunnel that was their entrance, the smoky warrior grunted in discomfort at the cold surface of the passage. Behind her, she could distinguish three other complaining grunts that quickly subsided.

Blinking to adjust to the light, she guided her clanmates through the almost silent forest. Her paws sunk in several mud banks but she dismissed the sensation of the sticky fur to remain alert for any unfamiliar sound.

"Hear that?", Eagleshadow perked his ears and looked around wildly. "What's that sound?"

The whole patrol froze with their ears perked. Greyfrost snarled under her breath and nudged Smokeshade. "It's like a monster's roar"

Smokeshade rolled her eyes in disbelief. "Don't be ridiculous, monsters never come to our territory. They just appear far away from one of RaggedClan's borders. No, I know that sound". With another flick of her tail, the smoky warrior walked until they reached the river that marked part of the Southern border. Rising her voice so she would be heard over the thunderous roar of the current, Smokeshade pushed her clanmates far away from what was left of the Great Shore. "The rain caused a highflow! The current is too strong to get near it, a cat would drown in seconds! We need to report to Frozenswipe that there's a risk of flooding from this border!"

"But Frozenswipe told us to check the current!", Greyfrost yelled while glancing at the river. "You are basing your report in a hypothesis, not in a proved fact! We should actually check how strong is the current before returning to Camp!"

Smokeshade shook her head firmly as she walked back into the forest. "It's too dangerous! We still need to mark the Southern border from another spot and scout for intruders -which would be really stupid to try and invade during this rain and with a highflow river- before going back! I'm not risking anyone's life just to check if that current can carry off a cat!"

"But-!'

"I said no Greyfrost! We will not put a paw near that river!", said that, the she-cat turned around and headed for a safer part of the border. She heard the resigned huff of Greyfrost as everyone reassumed positions to follow her. Checking the highflow river? Did Greyfrost had a death wish or what?

"Come back!"

Before Addercrash even finished her sentence, Smokeshade was already sprinting behind Greyfrost as the young cat raced to the river. So she did had a death wish!

"Don't do it!", Smokeshade screeched in alarm as Greyfrost stopped on the peak of a stone that arched over the river. The grey warrior had a paw almost touching the frenzied waters' surface when she was grabbed by the scruff and pulled back. Greyfrost yelped in surprise, which quickly became an enraged snarl as the blue eyes of Smokeshade locked with her own. "I was about to complete Frozenswipe's orders!"

"No, you were not! You were going to be carried away by the current the moment your paw came in contact with the river! I gave the order of no nearing the shore for a reason!"

Greyfrost arched her back and bared her teeth. "And I was about to make Frozenswipe proud! I'm not a weak kit like you! I'm not scared of taking risks to finish a task!" The outraged she-cat swiped an unsheathed paw to Smokeshade's head. By instinctual reflex, the she-cat dodged the swipe and stepped back to put more space between herself and the attacker.

Time seemed to stay still as her hind legs slipped from the border of the stone arch and the rest of her unbalanced body followed in a flail of paws and fur. Her blue eyes were widened in surprise and raw fear as the grey sky mocked her before she was swallowed by frenzied waters and carried by the current. Dazed, she kicked her legs around, trying desperately to grab hold of something, anything, to prevent her from drowning but her paws were just met by water and more water. Her lungs ached and her throat started to close as she shocked on the water that found its way in her mouth. The current shot her to the surface in the spur of the moment before submerging her again. She vaguely heard what appeared to be a scream before she was greeted again by the crazed torrent. Her eyes looked around wildly underneath the strength of the liquid for the shore but her pelt pulled her down as a persistent creature of the dept. Pain erupted from her neck and she was falling. Falling in the dark abyss of unconsciousness.


	2. Like Glass, it all Shatters

_"Our life is brief..."_

_"Hey Smokekit! Come and play Hunters with us!"_

_"Are you sure Dustkit?"_

_"Of course! The other will be happy to have you in the game! Right, Frozenpaw, Adderkit?"_

_"Positive"_

_"Of course!"_

_"Great!"_

_"...everyone complains about the lack of time we have to enjoy it..."_

_"-eyfrost! Help me drag her out!_

_"She is not moving!"_

_"S-She just slipped by herself!"_

_"...the truth is that we have the time, we just don't enjoy it..."_

_"Then you shall be known as Smokepaw! Hailwhisker will be your mentor!"_

_"Dustpaw! Adderpaw! Firepaw! Smokepaw!"_

_"Hailwhisker! The deputy! I'm so jealous!"_

_"Of course you are Dustpaw! But Trushcloud is one of the most experienced warriors in the Clan!"_

_"Yeah, you're right... I bet I will win you in a fight"_

_"Keep dreaming tom"_

_"...difficulties are just tests in our path, Smokeshade..."_

_"She is so cold!...swipe will question...op staring! Move it!"_

_"You're too fast, Adder...Greyfrost, head to Camp and war..."_

_"...everyone must face difficulties in their lives..."_

_"Adderpaw! Wait up!"_

_"You're too slow!"_

_"Not true!"_

_"So true!"_

_"Come on Adderpaw, stop for a minute"_

_"All right, all right! Just because you're my best friend"_

_"...difficulties are just a way to force us to compensate our defects..."_

_"What happened o...Redstrike, quick! Smokeshade has..."_

_"W-We were by the Southern bor..."_

_"Move her to my den, qui..."_

_"Will she be..."_

_"Is she death?"_

_"Barely holding on...cobwebs...someone go and get some...OUT!"_

_"...be patient and courageous during this rough periods of time..."_

_"Duststream! Addercrash! Firepath! Smokeshade!"_

_"At least!"_

_"Warriors..."_

_"Good job friends!"_

_"We did it!"_

_"...for life..."_

_"Don't blame Frozenswipe for this, Smokeshade. All of us are living during difficult times, she is just doing what she thinks is right"_

_"You are going to tell her that! You are going to allow Badgerstar to make her a warrior soon! Forget it Duststream! I'm the one who was co-supervising her final assessment and my report will be full of reasons to stuck her as apprentice for several other moons"_

_"...always prizes..."_

_"What's up with Duststream"_

_"He hates me"_

_"He does not! He is your best friend!"_

_"He believes me an arrogant fool after my rant about Greypaw's assessment"_

_"...well, he is judgmental"_

_"I don't know what to do, Addercrash!"_

_"...those who overcame those obstacles of the way..."_

_"StarClan, help this poor young one"_

_"...those who stood firm as they walked on fire..."_

_"No, you were not! You were going to be carried away by the current the moment your paw came in contact with the river! I gave the order of no nearing the shore for a reason!"_

_"And I was about to make Frozenswipe proud! I'm not a weak kit like you! I'm not scared of taking risks to finish a task!"_

_"Smokeshade!"_

_"Grab her, quick!"_

_"She's not moving!"_

_"...those who held their head high as everyone they knew mocked them..."_

_Falling. Falling through the darkness. Painless. Sightless. Scared. Where's everyone? Where am I?_

_Chocking. Chocking on dark water as it entered my mouth. Spitting it out won't work. Lungs aching. Claws glinting in the liquid. A prayer to StarClan. Water everywhere. It swallows me. It engulfs me. It devours my fur as I struggle to survive. A harsh light. Panic. Desperation. Grief. Remorse. Fear. Water everywhere. Darkness invades my vision. It enters my ears. It covers my paws. It pulls on my tail. The fight to survive the howling current. Water everywhere. The white hot pain on my neck. My head throbs with the sudden impact. Pulling. Something's pulling me away. Away from the unforgiving current. I'm cold. Alone. Frightened. Forgotten._

_Water everywhere._

_"...those who overcame their disabilities to become true fighters. That is the point of difficulties. It makes us true Warriors."_

**Xxx**

The insistent feeling of something nudging her side pulled Smokeshade out of the shadowed abyss that was her mind. Blinking open her eyes she flinched at the harsh sunlight that washed over her face. Her head started to hurt badly as she struggled to sit up. Where was she?

"What do you think you are doing?!", a muffled raspy voice spat as soon as she moved. Smokeshade slowly reopened her eyes to met Redstrike's infuriated yellow gaze. The old medicine cat pushed her back into the nest, causing a wave of dizziness and pain to crawl it's way up to her head. "You shouldn't be moving around!"

The smoky warrior looked around, dazed. She was alive?

As if reading her mind, the skinny ginger tom snorted and continued changing the cobwebs covering her flank. "You're lucky to be alive. Some more heartbeats in the water and you would be running with stars all over your pelt. Fox-brained cats who care a mouse-tail about their lives..."

"Why does my head hurts so much?", she practically croaked out. Smokeshade vaguely wondered when would Redstrike help her take that horrible cobweb from her ears.

"You hit a rock", he said flatly. The tom refused to even look at her until he had finished with her flank and proved the strength of the applied cobwebs. "Don't you dare try to walk. Your head should stop hurting by the second sun. No visits until you regain the strength"

Smokeshade nodded and was about to curl up again when Redstrike stomped to the front and disappeared through the bramble entrance. Dumbfounded, the she-cat waited until the ginger tom had returned. She was mildly surprised to see a deep scowl marking his features. "What happened?"

The tom glared at her with hatred, though it was not directed to her. "You didn't hear them? That ungrateful, halfwit new warriors! They come hear to annoy me each chance they got! They make me just want to lash out!"

"Who of the three was it?", Smokeshade asked calmly. Of course she had an idea of who. After all, that grey pest had being bothering her since she moved to the warrior's den. But to keep Redstrike's aggressive temper under control while she was under his watch was her top priority.

"The runt, Greyfrost"

Smokeshade nodded. Yes, that sounded like something she would do. "Then perhaps when I'm recovered and you help me get these cobwebs from my head then I can have a talk with the she-cat"

Redstrike's yellow gaze pierced her eyes with an unknown emotion that made Smokeshade want to curl up in a corner and disappear. The unnerving tension marking the medicine cat's muscles made the fur along her back spike.

"Smokeshade, there are no cobwebs on your head", his voice was but a mere whisper, though Smokeshade had the feeling that it was as loud as a yell.

"What? But I can barely hear you or anything else for the matter! There must be something obstruc-", the she-cat froze. Dread swirled in her mind and invaded all of her body. She could feel her tail lashing nervously beside her and her whiskers flatten against her muzzle. Her ears perked and twitched nervously, trying, _begging_ to hear the tom laugh and tell her to move over so he could change those cobwebs. But as the heartbeats passed, reality stroke Smokeshade as a tidal wave.

"Your ears suffered the most", Redstrike began unsure. The tom placed a comforting tail over her shoulders as she trembled. "The sensitive internal organ was damaged. The water was carrying all sort of materials carried by the rain. You had an ear infection when I finally treated your external injuries. I did what I could to save your hearing but..."

"I'm half deaf", Smokeshade whispered.

"I'm truly sorry Smokeshade", Redstrike soothed her. Her scared blue eyes looked up to his, dare she say it, softening yellow gaze. "What's going to happen to me, Redstrike?"

"Time will tell"

**Xxx**

_"What?!"_

Badgerstar's posture didn't even change from her sudden outburst. The leader regarded her with the same calmness that he displayed at the Gatherings. "Your current disability will cause you more harm that good in a battle, Smokeshade. It's only logical for you to cease your activities as a warrior permanently. You'll become a liability during a fight and we can't allow ourselves to pass through another hostage situation. Please understand, I'm doing what's best for my Clan"

"B-But what will I do? I have trained all my life to be a warrior for EchoClan! I can't just throw my training away because of this accident!"

"Smokeshade", the baritone voice seemed to harden just a fraction but it still made the she-cat flinch. This was her leader she was snapping to! "I know it's hard for you to accept it. I can't even imagine what are you now living with but I can't ket you out there and get yourself killed by RaggedClan. What would happen if you didn't hear an order? Or if you couldn't detect an enemy trying to sneak up on you?"

"I know this isn't fair but you have two options now: you either move into the elder's den with Trushcloud and Hailwhisker or you train under Redstrike as medicine cat"

_"...Ripping away the medicine cat from his position and force him to train as warrior?"_

The thought crossed her mind in a flash. Ironic. Really ironic if she really analyzed it. Her fate was decided in that sentence but the titles were swapped. Who knew?

Smokeshade's mind raced to find a third solution. She begged to StarClan to think of something else, of anything other than giving up her position. She couldn't just give up on all her training like that. She could still protect her Clan somehow! But as much as she pondered her situation, it all came to one thing: her disability would curse her to a different path. She couldn't be a warrior anymore. But if she really wanted to serve her Clan, there was an available option. The only way that allowed her to somehow rebuilt her already shattering life.

"I-I still want to serve my Clan", Smokeshade muttered and was surprised to realize the difficulty she had on commenting her decision. "I will train with Redstrike"

Badgerstar nodded, looked around, and then leaned over her. "I'm sorry to force this two options on you. Forgive me"

Xxx

"Let all cats old enough to set a paw in the deep caves gather beneath the Moss Rock for a Clan meeting!", Badgerstar's voice rang across the Camp. From her position beside the large black tom, Smokeshade was surprised to actually hear him pretty well. Who know the tom's rich baritone would be some of the few things she could still hear?

The muffled sound of pawsteps snapped her back to reality as multiple eyes glanced her way. From beside her, Redstrike lightly nudged her without taking his eyes from the crowd. "Don't flinch back"

"Everyone's aware of the river accident eleven suns ago", Badgerstar started. "Smokeshade is fully recovered and ready to return to her normal activities. However, due to a complication during her recovering, Smokeshade is unable to return to her life as a warrior or to perform patrols again. A-"

"Will she get privileges then?", someone sneered from the crowd. Smokeshade's blue eyes narrowed at Greyfrost, daring the she-cat to continue.

"Well, that's no fair!", Nightsong growled in defiance. Murmurs started to rise as the cats became agitated, eyes watching both Smokeshade and Badgerstar in a mix of confusion, pity, outrage and understanding. For once, Smokeshade thanked her condition for preventing all the murmurs from reaching her.

"Silence!", Frozenswipe's voice quieted them in a heartbeat. The usually stoic deputy was bristled in anger, her light grey tail lashing like an outraged adder.

Badgerstar nodded his approval to the she-cat and continued. "Smokeshade will continue to serve EchoClan as the medicine cat apprentice due to her auditive complication. Every warrior is to return to their normal activities. Meeting dismissed"

**Xxx**

"Tansy, catmint, cobweb, poppy seed...yarrow?"

Redstrike sighed and pushed the herbs aside. "Marigold, actually"

Smokeshade's ears flattened in frustration. She already had moons of training as medicine cat, yet all the new knowledge seemed to fly away from her mind. She was frustrated with herself. The she-cat knew she could memorize the names, she knew she could! But as much as she concentrated and as much as she tried, the ex-warrior just couldn't fulfill her new role as medicine cat.

"Don't worry about it", Redstrike said softly. "You'll get it right one day, you'll see". The ginger tom glanced at the entrance, growled something to low for his apprentice to hear, and then rolled his eyes in exasperation. "You have a visitor, it seems. Just don't strain yourself too much or I will have your tail when I get back"

Smokeshade watched her mentor disappear through the bramble tunnel of the entrance -as soundless as the previous moons- and waited for the telltale vibration that came before any cat passed through. The bramble shook harshly and a dark grey head with yellow eyes invaded her vision. Addercrash caught sight of her and smiled gleefully. "Smokeshade! How are you doing?"

The smoky she-cat purred and signaled her friend to sit by her side. "I'm doing well until now, Addercrash. Being a medicine cat is so different than what we warriors used to imagine"

"I can imagine. There are so many herbs and uses for them to learn! But oh well, better memorize those things than dealing with Redstrike's infamous temper...", Addercarsh trailed off when noticing the sharp glare Smokeshade directed to her. "What? Don't tell me it's not true"

"Actually, being the medicine cat's apprentice gave me a privilege. Redstrike might be grumpy, snarky and bad tempered but I got to see that side of him that no-one else saw. He's actually a compassionate cat, you know? He supported me from the very first day of my training as if he was an old friend", Smokeshade whispered to her friend, not wanting any eavesdropper to annoy Redstrike with her opinion.

"I never thought old Redstrike could be capable of that but-". By the sudden jump of her friend, Smokeshade guessed that Frozenswipe had called requested her presence. It was funny actually, still half deaf yet she could sometimes understand things better than when sound reached her ears fully. With an apologetic shrug and a quick flick of her whiskers, Addercrash slipped away through the bramble tunnel. Smokeshade watched her friend retreat with longing in her eyes. How she wished she could go out there and patrol again...

The growl of her stomach prevented the she-cat from going again in a grief-stricken mood. Licking her lips, the medicine cat padded out of the den to find her share of prey.

The sunlight washed over her pelt the instant she abandoned the shade of the cave. She blinked a few times before following the stony path to the bottom of the Camp. Her paws followed the soft and well-marked trail zigzagging downwards until the surface changed. She walked confidently up to the fresh-kill pile -a pretty big one- and picked up a plump squirrel. Glancing around and noting that the Camp appeared to be empty, she found a peaceful spot near the Moss Rock that had a nice shadow to lay at. With the squirrel in her mouth, Smokeshade enjoyed the pleasurable feeling of the wind through her fur before starting to dig in her prey. For once since the day of her accident, the ex-warrior had found a moment to be alone.

"Hey old fox! What are you doing?"

Smokeshade could feel her pelt starting to bristle by the sudden interruption. Forcing herself to remain calm, she regarded the annoyance with cold indifference. "Yes Nightsong? Is there something I can help you with?"

The ginger and brown she-cat snorted, her eyes shining with malice. "Actually, old fox, you could help me by removing your tail from here and returning to your little den"

"I would prefer if you refrained from calling me old fox", Smokeshade spat in irritation. Nightsong merely smirked and muttered under her breath. Smokeshade's ears perked in an attempt to hear something subconsciously before she could stop them. Of course Nightsong would mock her when no-one could see her. She quickly made a mental note to control the sudden jerk of her ears before standing up and leaving for her den.

"That's it old fox! Run! Run away like the filthy coward you are!"

**Xxx**

"Smokeshade!"

The she-cat jolted awake in fright. Redstrike merely slapped his tail across her ears and finished dragging a body to one of the nests. Smokeshade quickly rolled to her paws, inwardly growling at the moss accumulated in her fur and between her claws. She vaguely wondered if Redstrike would allow her to grab some feathers...

"Stop daydreaming, you moronic cat! This wounds won't heal for themselves!"

"What's the gravity of the wound?", she quickly asked, hoping that her mentor's answer would be verbal rather than through claws. The old tom grunted in frustration as he assessed the wounds and signaled her to have a look. Smokeshade almost screeched in horror at the sight. Various deep lacerations adorned the cat's stomach and neck, a steady stream of blood damping what was left of fur. The hind legs were all scratched, as if something tried to prevent the unfortunate victim from escaping. One of the paws was crooked in an impossible angle and the chest was completely furless and bloodied.

"StarClan have mercy on Duststream", Redstrike muttered as he started licking the wounds clean. Dashing to the deepest part of the den, Smokeshade's ears darted from herb to herb. "Training, don't fail me now!"

"Smokeshade, we don't have all sun!" The she-cat nervously grabbed marigold and started chewing it. With a trembling paw, she snatched up some cobwebs and trotted up to Duststream. Redstrike nodded at her encouragingly and critically observed her as she applied the poultice to the lacerations and wrapped them up with the cobwebs. A proud smile threatened to show up on his features but the younger she-cat was too busy to notice. The ginger medicine cat examined the cobwebs and nodded. "Great job Smokeshade! So you did remember where was the marigold!", signaling to the broken leg, the tom studied her reaction. "Now, what do we do with this?"

Smokeshade narrowed her eyes in concentration and returned to the herb storage, returning with broom leaves hanging from her jaws as well as more cobwebs. She quickly crushed the leaves, rubbed them along the tiny scratched near the fracture, and started wrapping them around the leg. Once done, she reinforced the bandage with cobwebs and looked at her mentor expectantly. Said cat was actually smiling at her. "You're improving"

Smokeshade nodded in acknowledgment but her eyes kept glancing at Duststream worriedly. Redstrike noticed the uneasiness of his apprentice and wrapped a tail around her shoulders comfortingly. "What troubles you, kit?"

"What did this to him?", her voice was hollow and low, making it difficult to hear herself.

"RaggedClan", Redstrike spat with venom. "The borders were changed by them last sun. Badgerstar was outraged! He send out a patrol to remark the original borders but they got separated by RaggedClan cats. Duststream was found after the small battle like this. Cowards never showed their faces..." The medicine cat huffed and headed for the entrance. He paused for a heartbeat before turning to her and raising his voice. "If he wakes up, give him some poppy seeds. I'm going to have a talk with Badgerstar". Smokeshade merely nodded and watched her mentor retreat.

**Xxx**

A muffled, for her, moan of pain made Smokeshade rearrange her daily herb-sorting for later. Grabbing up two poppy seeds, the she-cat made her way to her patient. The patched tom's eyes flew open as he took in his surroundings. The confused amber gaze landed on Smokeshade and it was replaced by coldness. Smokeshade merely placed the poppy seeds near his mouth and nudged them closer. "Eat them, they'll ease your pain"

Duststream studied her for a heartbeat before eating the seeds, his eyes never leaving hers. The smoky she-cat shifted nervously under the calculative gaze. "You had several lacerations and one broken leg. The bone's healing quickly so we won't need to worry for future problems."

The tom considered her words for a moment, his whiskers barely twitching. Then, with a huff of resignation, he lowered his head back to the nest. "At least I get to get out soon..."

Smokeshade was certain that Duststream had said something else. She could practically feel the whisper from the tom's jaws. Posture tensing, she flicked her tail in a dismissal. "I have no idea what is the problem with you". The she-cat bit back a screech when razor-sharp claws dug into her tail. Shocked blue eyes met outraged amber and, for a heartbeat, the medicine cat thought she saw desperation glint behind the cold spheres. "What's the problem with me, you say?", the poison-laced snarl wasn't particularly loud (not that she could detect that anyway) but it made Smokeshade feel cornered. "Oh, I don't know, _Foxface_! It may have nothing to be with the fact that you betrayed me!"

"How is becoming half-deaf betraying you _Coldheart_?! I should be the one feeling betrayed, not you! Do you have any idea of what is to be only visited by Addercrash? To only have one friend support you? I have been teased, judged and ignored! Most of the Clan is calling me a coward! You have no idea what's to live as a prisoner in the middle of a rival Clan", the she-cat snarled back, not giving Duststream the satisfaction of making her whimper in distress. Though as her words hung in the silence, the suffocating feeling of regret started to claw its way up her heart. Her betrayed and wounded mind saw a lying, self-centered enemy that would slice her neck open at night if he got the chance. But in sharp contrast, her compassionate yet fading soul saw a confused friend who was barely holding on.

"Lie to yourself old fox. You followed the path of the cowards and you turned your back to the Clan. To your life". _To me_

* * *

_**Smokeshade and Duststream's discussion inspired in a mayor fight I had years ago with one of my friends. Luckly, we aren't cats or I would had had my ears shredded...**_


End file.
